Sunday, June 6, 2010


PCOSChick wrote a very poignant post about BFFs (Best Fertile Friends), and it made me think about my BFFs. I am such a lucky girl that I have two, we'll call them BFF(H) and BFF(B). These two women are not just my Best Fertile Friends, they are my absolute Best Friends Forever (aside from the Professor of course).

BFF(H) is a friend from my wild-child college days. I first introduced her here. I've known her longer than I've known my husband. She was my Maid of Honor at my wedding. We've been through some truly horrible ordeals together and we've had a lot of fun together, and year after year, we appreciate each other more. She has always been the first one to jump to my defense when I feel hurt or slighted, always ready with an offer to fly across the country to kick somebody's ass for me (and she could do it, too, she's fit). When I told her about my infertility, she just said "Damn, that sucks", and when I explained to her that basically my ovaries and my uterus had communication issues, she came back with the suggestion that they should seek couples counseling because she'd heard it really worked wonders for that problem! Not a trace of pity, which would have crushed me. She just comes at life fists raised and cracking jokes. It just breaks my heart to know that, barring a miracle, we will never live in the same place again. She got married last year, and is now 5 months pregnant with her first child. And I so cannot wait to watch her be a Mom, because it's gonna be a riot!

BFF(B) is a newer friend that I met at my previous job about six years ago, when we were both unmarried and childless. Now we're both married, and I'm still childless. I was there when she had her miscarriage, and she was there when I had mine. We had the exact same problem, but I had a different doctor and a lot more monitoring so I feel like I got off easy after what I saw her endure. When I told her about my infertility, she asked intelligent questions about the problem and the plan without getting soppy. And she just keeps telling me "You'll get there. You will." and it's hard not to believe her. She is the one who when I got my period after the last IUI, told me to come on over, put the kids to bed early and cracked open a bottle of red. I've watched her wrangle those three kids with calm and humor that I cannot fathom. She and her husband are possibly the most fertile people I know, and they are the people the Professor and I will look to for parenting tips should we be so lucky.

Take a minute to think about your BFF, then give them a call or send them a note and let them know how much they mean to you.

1 comment:

  1. This is a very sweet post... and it's nice to aknowledge the fertile people that are actually helpful and sensitive to our issues. Lord knows I make fun of all the INSENSITIVE fertiles all the time so it's yes, the ones that actually have a clue and are supportive deserve a "Slackie O-vation". :)