This is not Letting Go. This is Losing A Dream.
I'm numb, in shock, in denial. Mildly bitter, but still strangely calm. Utterly clueless about what my next move should be.
IVF obviously. But what do I do now? Call the clinic on CD1... but why? What will they tell me to do? I have no plan of action, no calendar in place. Another consultation to create a plan?
This can't possibly be my life. This kind of thing just doesn't happen to me. Oh sure, you hear or read about other people going through this all the time. It's so much more common than you might think. But it's always been other people. Not me. I feel like I just landed a starring role in someone else's movie.
It seems more than a little disingenuous of me after everything we've been through in the last 2+ years, that I never really believed we would have to go to such lengths to reproduce. How is it that this can still come as such a shock?