Sunday, June 5, 2011

Breaking Up Is Hard to Do

I have a confession to make: I broke up with my acupuncturist in April, but I haven't told her yet. I'm thinking she'll figure it out on her own.

I've been seeing her as needed for various ailments for almost 10 years now. When I started doing fertility treatments, she told me she wanted to add a bunch of herbs to my plan. I'm not an herbal supplement kind of girl. Yes, I take my vitamins. Yes, I try to use foods where possible to improve my health. But somehow, I can't jump on the herb-wagon. So I hemmed and hawed and told her I'd think about it, and then studiously avoided mentioning herbs ever again. I did bring it up with my RE, just to see what he had to say, and what he said was, "Do NOT take any herbs while doing these treatments." Very emphatic, no room for doubt about his thoughts there.

At my last appointment back in April, my acupuncturist started in about the herbs again. She had just been to some sort of master class and had her belief in the Power-of-The-Herbs renewed, and she felt the need to push. I told her no, I haven't been taking them and wasn't inclined to do so. She questioned that, and I told her I just wasn't comfortable with it. She launched into a lecture about balance and completeness in treatment and how doing acupuncture without herbs was only half the solution and WHY wouldn't you want to do everything you can, don't you really want to get pregnant?

If I tell my doctor I am not comfortable with a particular form of treatment, I expect them to respect my feelings. They may present alternatives, or explain potential consequences of declining the treatment, but I don't expect to be judged by my doctor. So I cancelled my appointment for the following week, and never went back.

Of course, now that I'm on the brink of IVF, I'm feeling guilty for not having this particular tool in my treatment bag. There is one acupuncturist recommended by my fertility clinic. Unfortunately, he is currently booking new patient visits two months out. So... I'm moving forward without this tool.

I'm just gonna have to let that go.


  1. WHY wouldn't you want to do everything you can, don't you really want to get pregnant?

    Yeah, that would bring an, "I'm sorry, I can't see you anymore," from me. I can't believe she said that!

  2. Good for you!
    Does the other acu guy have a waiting list in case of cancellations?
    Hoping the best for you!

  3. I decided a couple of months ago to start acupuncture before ivf but didn't know who to use. I typed acu and infertility into google and a list of UK acupuncturists who deal with IF came up. I chose one who lived near me and had a chat with her on the phone. One of the questions i asked was about herbs as I'm against taking them too. I liked the answers she gave and went to see her. Two months on and I'm really happy with her. Might be worth looking into if u feel you'll miss it?

  4. ugh, I also cannot believe that she said that. I have been seeing my acupuncturist for a while, my RE is also dead set against me taking herbs and my acupuncturist has respected this
    please remember that you ARE doing everything you can. I suppose if we wanted to make ourselves truly crazy, we could dig up every single, possible, crazy fertility cure but seriously it is crazy making.
    wishing you so much luck with this and think you have a good shot with or without acupuncture.

  5. I think you made the right call and there's no point in beating yourself up for it. Better to have nothing at all than deal with someone who doesn't respect your needs and wishes. I love my needle guy because he always goes with my medical advice, never against it. That's what you need, and if you don't have that right away, better to have peace of mind.

  6. My wife tried acupuncture the first (of four) IVF cycles. The only thing that seemed to work was a bottle of Tanqueray and a lot of praying. I wish you the best...