Saturday, September 4, 2010

And It Just Keeps Sucking (Updated)

I have spent almost the entire day in tears. After this morning's monitoring visit, I just don't see how this cycle can work.

The whole point of these treatments is to get more than one mature follie to trigger so that there will be more than one corpus luteum dumping out progesterone so that Confuterus won't just up and flush out its contents at 9dpo.

I have one dominant follie. One.

The blood work indicates that my hormones are taking off. I go back for more monitoring tomorrow.

UPDATED (9.5.10): I still have a single dominant follie, which is now mature. I still don't have much hope for this cycle, but I am less emotional about it today.

When we questioned the doctor (not my usual one) about what exactly this "unexpected rise" in estrogen meant for the cycle and what the chances were for success with just the one follicle, she got incredibly uppity and defensive. She kept repeating that it wasn't a BAD thing and she didn't understand why we were so upset about it. She kept saying "People get pregnant with just one follicle all the time!" and all I could think was that if I can't get pregnant with 2-3 follicles, why on earth did she think just one would do the trick?! It wasn't a rhetorical question - I really wanted to know WHY she felt so confident. She was very clearly put out and annoyed by our lack of understanding. It was like being yelled at in a very hushed tone, and neither the Professor nor I appreciated it. She also described me as "aging", and I've been having enough trouble with my impending 38th birthday as it is.

I did FINALLY get her to understand that we had been so upset yesterday because no one bothered to EXPLAIN the results, or even just to say it wasn't bad. All we knew was that it was "unexpected" and "surprising" and not something they have seen my body do in past cycles. Of course we were worried - especially with the less than enthusiastic ovarian response this time!

Henceforth, I will request to see anyone BUT her for every appointment, and I will also tell my usual RE about this experience the next time we see him. I think I'll call her Dr. Hate, though the Professor had a much more accurate descriptive than I am willing to use here. I bet you can figure it out.

UPDATED x2: Estrogen is still high (for me), LH is beginning to surge. Plan:

Ganirelix + Gonal F tonight
Ovidrel tomorrow
IUI Wednesday
Fingers crossed for the next 2 weeks


  1. So sorry :( But it ain't over yet. Did you ask your RE why you're not responding as well this time around? Thinking of you and hoping for better news from your next u/s.

  2. I'm really sorry to hear this. ***hugs***

  3. there is a chance with every cycle. I know that sounds cliche and not like the thing you want to hear. But i have been right where you are a dozen times, this is what ruined my last IVF cycle. the only thing we can count on is that it will help the RE figure out what to do next time.

  4. I so sorry she was so awful to you both. My fingers will be crossed for you during this 2ww.


  5. Hopefully the one that's stuck around will be 'The One'. Wish you lots of luck...

  6. Oh, hun. I'm so sorry. I know how frustrating it is when your body does something unexpected - hello, there's a plan! And, bad docs are unacceptable, especially in this situation. I don't know what to say, other than "just keep going." You never know, that one little follie could be a super star!

  7. She said aging? I think I want to punch her.

    I had a bad experience one time and I made it clear to my RE I didn't want to ever see the other doctor again after it. It's awful for a dr to be like that because you are already so vulnerable everytime you go into that office.

    Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

  8. FX for your IUI and I want to smack that dr for you.

  9. Thinking about you and sending you good luck. That really stinks that other doctor got all upity and such when you asked the question.

  10. Sorry you had such a bad experience. It's probably a good idea to request someone other than her for your appointments. I also don't see how it is supposed to comforting to hear that people get pregnant with one follicle all the time. People also get pregnant w/o the help of medical intervention, but clearly we are not part of those people.